that I am holding a tightness between my shoulder blades

This is from Mahablog (and you can get more details if you like this "cut and paste" under the Aug 17 entry at mahablog.com). While a bit long it's worth the read. It's a fascinating game which was actually a psychological experiment where the participants didn't know all the details. It has great implications for our next election(s). And even if you have some questions regarding the validity of the conclusions - the experiment was a fascinating play of human behavior and personality!!! Enjoy:



The setting involved a rather sophisticated simulation of the earth's future called the Global Change Game, which is played on a big map of the world by 50-70 participants who have been split into various regions such as North America, Africa, India and China. The players are divided up according to current populations, so a lot more students hunker down in India than in North America….

Then the facilitators…call for some member, any member of each region, to assume the role of team leader by simply standing up. Once the "Elites" in the world have risen to the task they are taken aside and given control of their region's bank account. They can use this to buy factories, hospitals, armies, and so on from the game bank, and they can travel the world making deals with other Elites. They also discover they can discreetly put some of their region's wealth into their own pockets, to vie for a prize to be given out at the end of the simulation to the World's Richest Person. Then the game begins, and the world goes wherever the players take it for the next forty years which, because time flies in a simulation, takes about two and a half hours.

Altemeyer ran two distinct groups through this simulation. First, he came up with a simple twenty-two question test to score how much right wing authoritarianism ("RWA") an individual has in their personality. Next, he created two distinctly opposite groups of subjects: those who scored low in RWA, versus those who scored high in RWA. In turn, he let each group run the world:

The Low RWA Game

..67 low RWA students played the game together on October 18th . (They had no idea they had been funneled into this run of the experiment according to their RWA scale scores; indeed they had probably never heard of right-wing authoritarianism.) Seven men and three women made themselves Elites. As soon as the simulation began, the Pacific Rim Elite called for a summit on the "Island Paradise of Tasmania." All the Elites attended and agreed to meet there again whenever big issues arose. A world-wide organization was thus immediately created by mutual consent.

Regions set to work on their individual problems. Swords were converted to ploughshares as the number of armies in the world dropped. No wars or threats of wars occurred during the simulation. [At one point the North American Elite suggested starting a war to his fellow region-aires (two women and one guy), but they told him to go fly a kite–or words to that effect.]

An hour into the game the facilitators announced a (scheduled) crisis in the earth's ozone layer. All the Elites met in Tasmania and contributed enough money to buy new technology to replenish the ozone layer.

Other examples of international cooperation occurred, but the problems of the Third World mounted in Africa and India. Europe gave some aid but North America refused to help. Africa eventually lost 300 million people to starvation and disease, and India 100 million. Populations had grown and by the time forty years had passed the earth held 8.7 billion people, but the players were able to provide food, health facilities, and jobs for almost all of them. They did so by demilitarizing, by making a lot of trades that benefited both parties, by developing sustainable economic programs, and because the Elites diverted only small amounts of the treasury into their own pockets. (The North American Elite hoarded the most.)

One cannot blow off four hundred million deaths, but this was actually a highly successful run of the game, compared to most. …Low RWAs do not typically see the world as "Us versus Them." They are more interested in cooperation than most people are, and they are often genuinely concerned about the environment. Within their regional groups, and in the interactions of the Elites, these first-year students would have usually found themselves "on the same page"–and writ large on that page was, "Let's Work Together and Clean Up This Mess." The game's facilitators said they had never seen as much international cooperation in previous runs of the simulation. With the exception of the richest region, North America, the lows saw themselves as interdependent and all riding on the same merry-go-round.

The High RWA Game

The next night, 68 high RWAs showed up for their ride, just as ignorant of how they had been funneled into this run of the experiment as the low RWA students had been…. The game proceeded as usual. Elites (all males) nominated themselves, and the Elites were briefed. Then the"wedgies" started. As soon as the game began, the Elite from the Middle East announced the price of oil had just doubled. A little later the former Soviet Union (known as the CIS in 1994) bought a lot of armies and invaded North America. The latter had insufficient conventional forces to defend itself, and so retaliated with nuclear weapons. A nuclear holocaust ensued which killed everyone on earth–7.4 billion people–and almost all other forms of life which had the misfortune of co-habitating the same planet as a species with nukes.

When this happens in the Global Change Game, the facilitators turn out all the lights and explain what a nuclear war would produce. Then the players are given a second chance to determine the future, turning back the clock to two years before the hounds of war were loosed. The former Soviet Union however rebuilt its armies and invaded China this time, killing 400 million people. The Middle East Elite then called for a "United Nations" meeting to discuss handling future crises, but no agreements were reached. At this point the ozone-layer crisis occurred but–perhaps because of the recent failure of the United Nations meeting–no one called for a summit. Only Europe took steps to reduce its harmful gas emissions, so the crisis got worse. Poverty was spreading unchecked in the underdeveloped regions, which could not control their population growth. Instead of dealing with the social and economic problems "back home," Elites began jockeying among themselves for power and protection, forming military alliances to confront other budding alliances. Threats raced around the room and the CIS warned it was ready to start another nuclear war. Partly because their Elites had used their meager resources to buy into alliances, Africa and Asia were on the point of collapse. An Elite called for a United Nations meeting to deal with the crises–take your pick–and nobody came.

By the time forty years had passed the world was divided into armed camps threatening each other with another nuclear destruction. One billion, seven hundred thousand people had died of starvation and disease. Throw in the 400 million who died in the Soviet-China war and casualties reached 2.1 billion. Throw in the 7.4 billion who died in the nuclear holocaust, and the high RWAs managed to kill 9.5 billion people in their world–although we, like some battlefield news releases, are counting some of the corpses twice.

The authoritarian world ended in disaster for many reasons. One was likely the character of their Elites, who put more than twice as much money in their own pockets as the low RWA Elites had. (The Middle East Elite ended up the World's Richest Man; part of his wealth came from money he had conned from Third World Elites as payment for joining his alliance.) But more importantly, the high RWAs proved incredibly ethnocentric. There they were, in a big room full of people just like themselves, and they all turned their backs on each other and paid attention only to their own group. They too were all reading from the same page, but writ large on their page was, "Care About Your Own; We Are NOT All In This Together."

The high RWAs also suffered because, while they say on surveys that they care about the environment, when push comes to shove they usually push and shove for the bucks. That is, they didn't care much about the long-term environmental consequences of their economic acts. For example a facilitator told Latin America that converting much of the region's forests to a single species of tree would make the ecosystem vulnerable. But the players decided to do it anyway because the tree's lumber was very profitable just then. And the highs proved quite inflexible when it came to birth control. Advised that "just letting things go" would cause the populations in underdeveloped areas to explode, the authoritarians just let things go.

Now the Global Change Game is not the world stage, university students are not world leaders, and starting a nuclear holocaust in a gymnasium is not the same thing as launching real missiles from Siberia and North Dakota. So the students' behavior on those two successive nights in 1994 provides little basis for drawing conclusions about the future of the planet. But some of what happened in this experiment rang true to me. I especially thought, "I've seen this show before" as I sat on the sidelines and watched the high RWAs create their very own October crisis.

Please read Bob Altemeyer's The Authoritarians. Is there any question that people of this bent are completely unfit to be managing anything more complicated than their own sorry lives? How our world groans and suffers simply because so many of the people in power lack the empathy and basic orientation to connect with others who share with them this tiny blue green planet.

Reconciling My Family Shadow
Current mood: contemplative


I have been listening to German Radio on the internet lately. I've wanted to refamiliarize myself with the language again. I'm going to visit my family in the fall (*sigh* Oktoberfest in Gerrmany) I've missed my cousins; I haven't seen most of them in 5 yrs . . . or my dad.

Listening and thinking in another language has had some unexpected surprises. One is that it seems to have shifted something in my brain so that problem solving seems more creative and smooth – I'm sure there are studies on this but I couldn't quote them.


The other thing is that I have been acknowledging a shadow issue regarding my family and recognizing the amazing capacity we humans have for evolving. This nation that spawned Hitler and all its judgmental biases is very comfortable with gay marriage (well civil unions – but most citizens view their marriage as a civil union, it's a separation between church and state thing).

As an adolescent I was very critical and judgmental regarding my family's involvement in the Third Reich – and the fact that this was something they wanted to "move on from" (so they wouldn't talk about it) made it all the more a skeleton in the closet. This kid who was raised in the NYC of the 70's, surrounded by various cultures, in a nation who despite it's own shadows found it easy to forget them - and very easy to project them. . . this kid didn't have the capacity to see - "Like anyone drafted into the military in any nation – my grandfather, uncles, etc. - were soldiers"

All I could see from my safe haven was "why didn't you rebel against this monster?"

But I remembered (while listening to German Radio) a story about my grandfather who was stationed at the Russian Front when the war ended. There were no autos, buses or trains - Germany was devastated- so my grandfather had to walk home from the Russian Front to South Western Germany, near the French border. Weeks of travel and sleeping under harsh conditions walking hundreds of miles, stopping to work for food (what little there was). No change of clothes, place to bathe and no regular water supply outside of springs or rivers.

Now I'd think someone in this situation would be expecting to just get home and be taken care of. (I know I'd make it all about me. "Look at the shit I've been through. Take care of me!)

But the afternoon before reaching his village, he stopped at various farms to do work and collect a payment of eggs, bread, etc. Not for himself. He did this because he did not want to return home to his family empty handed. He was thinking of his wife and children. He had been away from his family, fighting for his country and was unable to provide for them while he was gone (and now there would be no "military benefits" – Germany was in ruins) and he understood the suffering they went through in his absence. The destruction of their village by allied bombs, their farm by the Nazi's, the anxiety that comes from not hearing from him for months, the not knowing if he was dead or alive and the hunger they were probably going through. After everything he had been through on the Russian Front and the journey home, he did not put himself first. I hope I can model that kind of selflessness if ever put to the test, but I am not really so sure I could.

Things aren't so black and white anymore; I'm not a teenager. Things don't fit so neatly into the "good" and "bad" category. Maybe I really am moving towards integration. I learned something from a soldier in the Third Reich.

The "devil" is in the details.  Look at the big picture first. Never lose sight of that!

Ken's absolute raw "realness" is often times more stimulatiing than his intellectualism.  I love this quote from Joe Perez's book "Soulfully Gay"
And if you read Joe's journey (written in the vein of "One Taste") you get why Ken says the following:

Start as a human being in this culture, toss in madness, toss in mystical states, toss in being gay, toss in being HIV-positive, toss in religion that assures you God hates you for all of that - and then look me in the eye and tell me you can feel ok about yourself.  I dare you. I just dare you.

Ken Wilber Source: Soulfully Gay: How Harvard, Sex, Drugs, and Integral Philosophy

 

All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think, we become.

Buddha (563 - 483 BC)

Life is usually never what I expect from day to day.  No surprise. People come in and out; their leaving or coming are either wanted or unwanted.  My feelings, thoughts and even my actions are often wrapped around these movements of in and out.  Relationships are hard - it doesn't matter if they are friends, family or even lovers. 

I've put certain relationships (people) on a pedestal only to knock them down later.  I've been put on a pedestal by others, only to get the shit knocked out off me as I came tumbling down.  It's just what we tend to do.  Judge everything.

I've also noticed, whether it's myself or other people, that we tend to ignore the things that come up and point us to change OR we get perfectionistic about needing to change - a kind of ideal faultlessness.  Striking a balance in the middle of that dualistic thinking can be a bitch.  It can also be freeing.  And when I ignore that process is when I begin to project all my own shit onto another person (BTW, I see that a lot on Myspace with people feeling the need to post bulletins about "so and so", then "so and so" responds with an angry message back - just endless)

People of the world don't look at themselves, and so they blame one another.

Mevlana Rumi (1207 - 1273)

Source: Rumi Daylight: A Daybook of Spiritual Guidance

This is why meditation is so important to me.  It allows me to empty out my mind, my emotions - by allowing a nonjudgmental place for the thoughts and feelings to arise so I can look at these "negative" qualities with a spirit of compassion.  And when I practice this on myself, it tends to move outward - letting me find a place of compassion for others.  When I'm an ass, it usually means I'm not being very mindful and am being an ass towards myself as well.

A vessel is formed from a lump of clay with care, however, it is the empty space within the vessel that makes it useful.

Lao Tzu (c.604 - 531 B.C.)

Source: Tao Te Ching

My ego is no different than anyone elses.  It's fragile, defensive and even healthy at times.  There is this endless chess match that goes on with myself - there is no checkmate, just the moves on this infinite board.  In one sense I am emptying out and in another sense I am developing.  Filling up and pouring out, filling up and pouring out, filling up and . . .  Right now I am about emptying and it's a struggle (I have been missing some people and trying to examine how I've acted and how they've acted to cause this space between us.  But it is more than one person right now, so I need to sit with this recent pattern.  And if you're one of those people I am isolated from, feel free to email me - I will not be offended by what you have to say. . . and I will probably have my own perspective on  all of it). Sometimes it's hard to be kind enough to myself to even sit with my shit - I'd rather ignore it . But

Here's to loving ourselves now, and loving ourselves enough to become something more.

Obi

"As an irrigator guides water to his fields, as an archer aims an arrow, as a carpenter carves wood, the wise shape their lives."

~ Buddha, 6th century bce Indian mystic and founder of Buddhism
from The Dhammapada

Integral thinking (as espoused by Ken Wilber) has had a restorative effect on my being, giving me a framework - a map - to guide me along this emptying and developing.  This filling up and pouring out.  Helping to balance me, that place somewhere between denial of my shortfalls and needing to correct them all. (I can be so bipolar in this area)

Human beings have a variety of intelligences, such as cognitive intelligence, emotional intelligence, musical intelligence, kinesthetic intelligence, and so on. Most people excel in one or two of those, but do poorly in the others. This is not necessarily or even usually a bad thing; part of Integral wisdom is finding where one excels and thus where one can best offer the world one's deepest gifts.

Ken Wilber

Source: AQAL Journal, pp. 8-9, Vol. 1, No. 1

To be "integrally developed" does not mean that you have to excel in all the known intelligences, or that all of your lines have to be at level 3. But it does mean that you develop a very good sense of what your own psychograph is actually like, so that with a much more Integral self-image you can plan your future development.

Ken Wilber

Source: Source: AQAL Journal, page 11, Vol. 1, No. 1

I hope you find yourself being compassionate enough with yourself to be able to sit with your darkside and accept your light.  To embrace your strength and to realize and embrace your shortcomings.  It's such a fucking incredible contribution to yourself and to the world

I recently had the priviledge of attending a true Hawaiian Hula and Chant (Not the tourist kind - but the an intentional spiritual blessing).  I was also, amazingly enough, able to have a private session performed for me - what a freak'n gift!.  The movement that follows the words is so in synch that there is no disconnect..  It is all one. Vibration in the tone, the movement and the intention. Pure beauty . . .

I was sitting with the philosopher's question this morning re:
"The beginning is the most important part of the work."
~ Plato, 5th century Greek philosopher
from The Republic
It was perfect timing.
I have found that the way I begin my day is the most important.  It sets the tone for the majority of the day.  If I am tired, I usually remain tired.  If I am moody, it usually takes effort later in the day to deal with "life". If i am in a centered place, nothing can usually throw me off balannce.
Now it's not about changing the mood.  It's about awareness.  Knowing where I am at the beginning gives me something to work with.  If I allow it (if I remain aware) it gives me clues about who this little "i" is (If I allow the big "I" to observe.  So the rest of the day is definitely a deeper connection in the mindful experience.
Today, I am tired, not in the mood for conflict and am in need of visiting a place that will most likely increse tension.  Oh well.
As Bono would say, "The boys can't dance. At least they know"

Hmmm - probably my ability to step back from a sitiuation and sit with it before moving on. It has served me well when I follow this. Of course the shadow side of that, is sometimes I ponder too long without acting *grin*

Starting this short blog with a definition (it's from Wikipedia - I know, I know - but it's a decent definition, lol)

The word ego is taken directly from Latin where it is the nominative of the first person singular personal pronoun and is translated as "I myself" to express emphasis. Ego is the English translation for Freud's German term "Das Ich."

In modern-day society, ego has many meanings. It could mean one's self-esteem; an inflated sense of self-worth; or in philosophical terms, one's self. However, according to the psychologist Sigmund Freud, the ego is the part of the mind which contains the consciousness. Originally, Freud had associated the word ego to meaning a sense of self; however, he later revised it to mean a set of psychic functions such as judgement, tolerance, reality-testing, control, planning, defense, synthesis of information, intellectual functioning, and memory.

so that being said (or written), here's an interesting quote I came across in Sensei's post from MySpace:

"Our attitude should be, not so much to destroy ego as a villain or an evil force, but to work with the situation of ego as a stepping stone, a process. At this point, the only material we have is ego. There's no other way to work with spirituality. Ego is the starting point, the only way. Relating with ego is the only path that we have in relating with spirituality and enlightenment. In fact, from that point of view, we should celebrate that we have ego. We have some hope of attaining enlightenment because we have ego. That is the starting point. And that is the attitude of warriors."

- chogyam trungpa

From Talk Three of "Meditation: The Way of the Buddha," a seminar at Naropa Institute. June 24, 1974.


Currently reading :
Soulfully Gay: How Harvard, Sex, Drugs, and Integral Philosophy Drove Me Crazy and Brought Me Back to God
By Joe Perez
Release date: By 08 May, 2007